I just started an online course for Intro to Philosophy and they asked us to introduce ourselves on the discussion board and talk about what we hope to get out of the course and what if any life philosophies we subscribe to...this was my post...thought I would share!
I enrolled in this course because there is a dichotomy that lives inside of me and I feel that the only way to ever find some semblance of balance is to keep asking myself why? When I read a profound quote I grasp its truth and relish in the discovery of knowledge. When I speak to others about my passion towards humanity and the adventure that is life, I know that it comes from a well of truth inside me. But...(and this is the piece of the puzzle I will endlessly strive to solve) my actions don't often mirror my most solid beliefs. I see that I am capable of making a difference in the lives of others just when I half ass it, so I often daydream about what I could accomplish if I could somehow manage to make my beliefs and my actions be one in the same. If I can live my life just being true to myself I feel that I will have a greater impact than all of the eloquent things I could ever hope to conjure up. There is a fundamental difference between being introspective and self-absorbed. I know that to live up to my full potential and fulfill my purpose here in this small spot of the cosmos that I must look within and constantly question my behavior. I grapple with how I can be so sure of something and not just instinctively act that out...but alas I am flawed. However, accepting that I am flawed (and shedding the delusion that perfection is attainable) is only the first step on my road to self-discovery. At this stage in my life I feel it is my duty, to dissect those flaws and learn something from them if I ever hope to have inner peace and make a positive impact on those around me...which brings me to this class. I have long thought of myself as a philosopher :), but I have come to think that perhaps I am being a little self-indulgent. I don't ever want to be the type of person who subscribes to a particular attribute without putting in the work to earn it. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading all of your posts and look forward to great discussions moving forward. And so we dive once again into the realm of the deeper tide that pushes our minds to contemplate...to me this is never idle time! Not all those who wander are lost!
Tuesday, October 22, 2013
Tuesday, October 15, 2013
Have you ever attended (or saw the poster) for a charity of
a family trying to raise money to continue their child’s cancer treatment? Have you ever met a single parent who lost
their partner to an illness and now lives on food stamps in a government rent
assisted apartment because they spent every last dime they had, even cashed in
their 401k to pay the medical bills that accrued trying to save their loved
ones life…and now have to struggle alone and raise their children in poverty? Have you ever actually asked for an itemized
bill from your doctor after a procedure and saw that they charged you $43 for
that popsicle stick they shoved down your throat? Do you know that the actual major component
used in hip replacements costs $350 to make, but your total cost will be
roughly $35,000? The reason that we are
not even close to being the greatest nation on Earth, and the reason why we are
not respected in most parts of the world is because we are a nation filled with
people who would rather let a child die than have their monthly premium
raised. Our respect for human dignity
only extends to our close circle. As we
sit in front of our flat screen HDTV’s texting on our $400 cellphone, sending
emails from our latest I pad…we bitch about “our rights” and “our problems”. People go around saying that the government
shouldn’t be involved in the medical practice and I totally agree…it is sad
that it has come to this point, but the greed and indignity that is prevalent
in our society has brought us to this point.
The ACA isn’t perfect, but it is a start. This LAW mandates that all people will
receive care regardless of their income, it makes it so that people like my
Mother who has diabetes isn’t discriminated against and over charged because of
her pre-existing condition. It puts caps
in place for how much doctors and pharmaceutical companies can charge for
services. So quit speculating about what
might happen, quit making false and ignorant statements like Obamacare will
allow the government to create death panels (insurance companies already have
become that…deciding that if you can’t pay you die), quit spreading the lie
that abortion will be a covered procedure.
I am disappointed that Obama hasn’t just come right out and said that
fact...this bill is spreading the pain.
I for one (and I am a single mother just getting by) will gladly pay a
little more every month for my insurance if it means that someone less
fortunate can receive treatment…because I value human life and believe that
everyone deserves to be helped in their time of need. It is not for me or anyone else to speculate
about what circumstances have put people in a place of need…our only purpose is
to love and offer healing to as many people as we can while we are here. There are a lot of good and generous people
out there…but we need to stop being meek in our work. And one more thing while I am at it…this
whole thing about testing adults for drugs in order to receive welfare isn’t
just affecting the addict…it is mostly affecting the children of the
addicts. As if it doesn’t suck enough to
have a druggie or drunk as a parent…now we will let them grow hungry. You wonder why our youth turn to crime, and
our a generation that has record numbers of suicide and depression? It is because they are shown from a young age
that being poor makes you worthless and you most likely will not climb out of
the pit of poverty…so they adapt to their environments and do what is necessary
to survive. Your pro-life and don’t
think employers should have to provide birth control as a part of insurance to
their employees…so you are willing to filibuster a LAW that’s very intent is to
SAVE lives? And in today’s top news
Sarah Palin joined protestors in front of the Veteran Museum in an effort to
re-open it? REALLY…how about you protest
for the government run before and after school programs that have been shut
down and now little kids have nowhere to go, and aid was stopped for the
government program that allows poor kids to get a free breakfast and lunch at
school (sometimes their only meals)? Why
not protest outside the social security office so that our elderly and disabled
don’t have their payments delayed? If
this rant lights the fire under even one person’s ass to begin to be vocal
about the lies and ignorance that is spreading like wildfire in our own
communities that would be cool. This
post is sponsored by the letters F & U and the good people at American
Express J Just kidding I am poor for an Amex J
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
My sister and I were just talking about how much we like the
new Pope, whilst snickering that he probably has a bounty on his head from
other members of the Arch Daises. I just
finished reading a TIME article about this very subject matter and it truly opened
my eyes. The position that the article
was taking was that the Pope isn’t a new breed of radical…rather he is a
radical traditionalist. Most of the
media does report the full interviews that showcase all of what the new Pope is
trying to express.
When he says that we pay too much attention to the downfalls
of homosexuality, abortion, and birth control…what he was trying to say is that
everyone is entitled to their own beliefs.
He for one as well as most of his followers believe in the moral code laid
out in the pages of the Bible. He
encourages his followers to remain steady in their faith, but in order to
remain steady in your faith you must not forget the very basis of Christianity…which
is that God gave us free will.
Christians are guilty of forgetting that one important piece of
information. God laid out a series of
moral guidelines which he encourages his followers to use as a guidepost to
life. However, for those that do not
believe the words He has written, they are free to make their own choices.
Mandating someone to follow your moral code is doing exactly
what the Almighty didn’t want. If you
believe that true judgment will come from God at the end of your journey…why
waste so much time judging those here on Earth.
Therein I believe is what the Pope was trying to get at. In a follow up interview that was much less
sensational, the Pope said that our purpose here on Earth was to heal our
fellow man and by being so outspoken in your judgment of others decisions you
rob yourself of fulfilling your purpose.
Instead he encouraged his followers to open their hearts and minds so
that you can be a healing force and plant the seed of your faith with your
actions.
Furthermore he pointed out that the number of souls needing
healing in today’s world is greater than ever and requires those with faith to
be a stronger light for refuge and hope.
Powerful stuff! So I sum this up
by saying that I REALLY like this new Pope because he isn’t encouraging people
to throw away their beliefs…he is simply saying that your faith should be
measured by your kindness and willingness to not just heal those that agree
with you but to go out and proactively search out those most in need of your greatest
gift…the gift of healing the broken and lost.
This is the humanitarian outlook that could make drastic changes in the
world…because we already tried the harsh, judgmental method and it simply doesn’t
work. I feel ever renewed in my efforts
to continue to let my love for my fellow people to be what guides me in my
daily interactions and I can only hope that this is the next thing trending on
Google J Also I am guilty of looking down on others that
do not agree with my liberal views…and so this was a great reminder that if we
are to agree with the Pope it should be in the sense that we take it to heart
in our own lives even if we are not governed by a spiritual mindset…two sides
to every coin and all that.
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Trees sing,
songs that float on the wind,
their leaves rustling gently,
hinting of love before it begins.
Trees breathe,
their arms open wide,
to pull the energy down,
turn the sunlight into life.
Trees smile,
at the birds in the sky,
the nests in their arms,
their reason for life.
Trees weep,
at the destruction of man,
oceans blue turned to black,
and forests reduced into sand.
Trees sleep,
in the winter snow,
wrapped like a blanket
around their stretched toes.
Trees dream,
of lilac skies,
aurora nights,
and the love in our eyes.
songs that float on the wind,
their leaves rustling gently,
hinting of love before it begins.
Trees breathe,
their arms open wide,
to pull the energy down,
turn the sunlight into life.
Trees smile,
at the birds in the sky,
the nests in their arms,
their reason for life.
Trees weep,
at the destruction of man,
oceans blue turned to black,
and forests reduced into sand.
Trees sleep,
in the winter snow,
wrapped like a blanket
around their stretched toes.
Trees dream,
of lilac skies,
aurora nights,
and the love in our eyes.
Saturday, August 17, 2013
Worth Mentioning
So there is a quote from the movie "Get Rich Or Die Trying"...and don't even start with the rolling of the eyes...that movie was a biography of a man's life...and it was a pretty crazy life...but either way I am here to discuss the quote.
Terrance Howard plays Bama...a guy who saves Curtis Jackson (50 cent) from getting murked in the showers. There is a scene were this guy is giving Bama some hard stares and Bama let's this guy and everyone else know that he doesn't like or trust this kid...and everyone is trying to tell him that the guy is cool...and so he says " Its like when I'm right I'm right, when I'm wrong I could been right, so I'm still right cause I coulda been wrong, you know, and I'm sorry cause I could be wrong right now, I could be wrong, but if I'm right...
I used to laugh at this whenever I heard it because I thought no...sometimes you are just wrong. But when I was flipping through channels and I came upon this exact scene tonight, I took a whole other meaning from it. I think what he was trying to say is even if I am wrong and this guy turns out to be cool...I am not wrong because my heart was in the right place by saying something. If I feel like something isn't right, it is my position that I should say something, because even if my premonition is wrong, my desire to protect my friends and family is on point...so I am right either way...and I like that.
This movie is not even in my top 10, but I still love it so all you hatorades pour out your cup of hatorade. This movie was greatly written because they told a really raw story and didn't even try to water it down. The opening scene shows this ten year old kid describing his Mom. He acknowledges that he knew that his Mother sold drugs, but as he so eloquently puts it "Selling drugs didn't mean anything to me but a place of our own, and new sneakers." She is driving him along and they are singing and all of a sudden she drives up on this dude selling on her corner. She tells him to stay in the car, and just goes and rushes on this dude! Naturally this boy loses his Mother some months later...she was burned to death in her own house, and he has to go live with his grandparents who already have about 8 other children living there. He is forced to sleep in a bed with three of his cousins. The writing so good that when he at 12 years old is out in the street slanding, you aren't even that shocked. The story unfolds and is interesting to follow...so I suggest checking it out, but if you don't at least you got a good quote out of reading all of this.
Terrance Howard plays Bama...a guy who saves Curtis Jackson (50 cent) from getting murked in the showers. There is a scene were this guy is giving Bama some hard stares and Bama let's this guy and everyone else know that he doesn't like or trust this kid...and everyone is trying to tell him that the guy is cool...and so he says " Its like when I'm right I'm right, when I'm wrong I could been right, so I'm still right cause I coulda been wrong, you know, and I'm sorry cause I could be wrong right now, I could be wrong, but if I'm right...
I used to laugh at this whenever I heard it because I thought no...sometimes you are just wrong. But when I was flipping through channels and I came upon this exact scene tonight, I took a whole other meaning from it. I think what he was trying to say is even if I am wrong and this guy turns out to be cool...I am not wrong because my heart was in the right place by saying something. If I feel like something isn't right, it is my position that I should say something, because even if my premonition is wrong, my desire to protect my friends and family is on point...so I am right either way...and I like that.
This movie is not even in my top 10, but I still love it so all you hatorades pour out your cup of hatorade. This movie was greatly written because they told a really raw story and didn't even try to water it down. The opening scene shows this ten year old kid describing his Mom. He acknowledges that he knew that his Mother sold drugs, but as he so eloquently puts it "Selling drugs didn't mean anything to me but a place of our own, and new sneakers." She is driving him along and they are singing and all of a sudden she drives up on this dude selling on her corner. She tells him to stay in the car, and just goes and rushes on this dude! Naturally this boy loses his Mother some months later...she was burned to death in her own house, and he has to go live with his grandparents who already have about 8 other children living there. He is forced to sleep in a bed with three of his cousins. The writing so good that when he at 12 years old is out in the street slanding, you aren't even that shocked. The story unfolds and is interesting to follow...so I suggest checking it out, but if you don't at least you got a good quote out of reading all of this.
Night Train
I love the way Amos Lee took the song "Night Train" and just made it look so effortless to give you this song....it became an instant favorite. When I first got the CD, I would chill some Mango wine and clean my house whilst listening to it. I would take a break when it would come on (7 songs in I believe) and I would lay on my back in my living room out in the country and just have a moment!
So when my sister and I got tickets to a show of his in Madison, we were stoked. It was sometime in late October or Novemeber. We headed down to Madison and got settled in the neighborhood of the venue which was the Barrymore Theater. It was a very hipster neighborhood, but I was cool with that because hipsters always have great resturants and usually a pretty chill vibe. So we ended up at this cool resturant called "Alchemy". We had an awesome dinner of spicy grilled catfish, and the strongest Martini's one could imagine. After dinner we headed right out to the Barrymore. We got inside and scoped out which bar we wanted to order from...and to my great surprise they were serving Lambrusico on tap for $1.25 in huge plastic cups! So needless to say my sister and I were all grins and giggles while the roadies were finishing up on stage...and than something unexpected happened.
The opener started. You have to keep in mind that I prefer and attend many more outdoor events than indoor. At an outdoor event, the opener is playing while you are getting settled, or making sure to get you last pee in...so sometimes you miss it! But in an indoor venure, when the opener came out, people got quieter. And when she started to sing....people fell silent. The opener was Priscilla Ahn. She was a beautiful waif of a dark haired girl, and she had a cazoo strapped to a face brace (like harmonica players do). Her voice was haunghtily beautiful and she was singing a song called "Dream". Words won't do justice to the beauty of this song, and the whole audience was captivated and we all got to our feet. I looked over at my sister and the purest tears streamed down her cheeks, but it was the lazy smile that occupied her expression that made me smile in turn...because it was a smile of utter joy. We stood there smiling at each other and crying with no need to apologize because you don't apologize for sharing that kind of moment...there is just something about unspoken joy that makes life worth living.
So by the time Amos Lee played "Night Train" we had made our way to the front were you could stand. We lost ourselves for the next couple of hours...and that is why I mention the song....because I love it and I loved that night with my sister...the only person who could have had the same understanding. We drove home in a bliss with permagrin (probably the Lambrusico and Vicodin assisted that magic carpet ride)...so yeah...Amos Lee is the bees knees!
So when my sister and I got tickets to a show of his in Madison, we were stoked. It was sometime in late October or Novemeber. We headed down to Madison and got settled in the neighborhood of the venue which was the Barrymore Theater. It was a very hipster neighborhood, but I was cool with that because hipsters always have great resturants and usually a pretty chill vibe. So we ended up at this cool resturant called "Alchemy". We had an awesome dinner of spicy grilled catfish, and the strongest Martini's one could imagine. After dinner we headed right out to the Barrymore. We got inside and scoped out which bar we wanted to order from...and to my great surprise they were serving Lambrusico on tap for $1.25 in huge plastic cups! So needless to say my sister and I were all grins and giggles while the roadies were finishing up on stage...and than something unexpected happened.
The opener started. You have to keep in mind that I prefer and attend many more outdoor events than indoor. At an outdoor event, the opener is playing while you are getting settled, or making sure to get you last pee in...so sometimes you miss it! But in an indoor venure, when the opener came out, people got quieter. And when she started to sing....people fell silent. The opener was Priscilla Ahn. She was a beautiful waif of a dark haired girl, and she had a cazoo strapped to a face brace (like harmonica players do). Her voice was haunghtily beautiful and she was singing a song called "Dream". Words won't do justice to the beauty of this song, and the whole audience was captivated and we all got to our feet. I looked over at my sister and the purest tears streamed down her cheeks, but it was the lazy smile that occupied her expression that made me smile in turn...because it was a smile of utter joy. We stood there smiling at each other and crying with no need to apologize because you don't apologize for sharing that kind of moment...there is just something about unspoken joy that makes life worth living.
So by the time Amos Lee played "Night Train" we had made our way to the front were you could stand. We lost ourselves for the next couple of hours...and that is why I mention the song....because I love it and I loved that night with my sister...the only person who could have had the same understanding. We drove home in a bliss with permagrin (probably the Lambrusico and Vicodin assisted that magic carpet ride)...so yeah...Amos Lee is the bees knees!
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
These are a few of my favorite things
OK...so I want to get talking about the five new movies I saw last week, but I realise that I haven't even discussed the types of film that I love. And I feel like you need a reference point of what I consider "the best" before you can feel comfortable taking my suggestions. I will not be able to tell you my favorite because I like such drastically different types of films that I would more than likely have to give my top favorite according to category....but I don't feel that is necessary. So what I will provide is a top ten list (in no specific order) of movies that I have watched time and time again. These are the movies that if nothing new is available to check out, I can safely fallback on my ICONIC yen because I know I will enjoy the tenth watch just as much as I did the first....and so we begin! Here is the first movie that must be mentioned...
Almost Famous
Why do I love this movie so much? Well it has great flow that is captivating from the opening scene, and as much as I want to call it a coming of age story, I am not sure that is accurate because the main character knew more than many of the adults. It is a love story in some respect because there is so much love between the characters, but no happily ever after cheesy shit. The stellar foundation of vintage classic music helps add depth. For those of you who have not seen this film let me at least give you a brief synopsis.
The main character is a young man named William and he is being raised by his single mother and his sister. His mother Elaine (played by Francis McDermott) is a college professor on the upper end of brilliant. She doesn't want her children to fall into the trap of drugs and evil rock music. She wants them to pursue the path ok true knowledge. Of course the older daughter Anita (played by Zoe Deschanel) hates that her mother tries to force her values on them. William on the other hand adores his mother and takes her advise to heart and doesn't even get mad when he finds out that she has been telling him that he is 15 so he won't feel weird about going to high school when he is only 13.
In one of the beginning scenes Anita gets caught trying to sneak a Simon & Garfunkel album in under her coat...and the following conversation takes place:
Anita Miller: It's unfair that we can't listen to our music!
Elaine Miller: That's because it's music about drugs and promiscuous sex.
Anita Miller: Simon and Garfunkel is poetry!
Elaine Miller: Yes it's poetry. It's poetry of drugs and promiscuous sex. Honey, they're on pot.
Anita Miller: First it was butter then it was sugar and white flour, bacon, eggs, Bologna, rock 'n roll, motorcycles. Then! It was celebrating Christmas on a day in September when you knew it wouldn't be commercialized! What else are you gonna ban?
Elaine Miller: Honey, you want to rebel against knowledge, I'm trying to give you the cliff notes on how to live life in this world.
Anita Miller: We're like nobody else I know!
Elaine Miller: I am a college professor. Why can't I teach my own kids? Use me!
Anita Miller: Darryl says that you use knowledge to keep me down. He says that I'm a "Yes" person and you are trying to raise us in a "No" environment.
Elaine Miller: Well, clearly "No" is a word Darryl doesn't hear much.
Anita Miller: I can't live here! I hate you! Even William hates you!
Young William: I don't hate her.
Anita Miller: You do hate her! You don't even know the truth.
Elaine Miller: Drama queen.
Anita Miller: Feck you!
Elaine Miller: Hey!
Anita Miller: This is a house of lies!
So as you can guess Anita decides to leave home with her boyfriend to find the freedom and independence that she has been seeking. The pivotal moment is when she tells him right before she leaves that she left all her vinyl under his bed. She writes a note that he should light candles and listens to The Dark Side of The Moon....fast forward several years and William is still a wonderfully innocent kid but he has fallen in love with the music that his sister left him and in his spare time he has been submitting articles to various magazines. He meets with his mentor Lester Bang, who is a long time music journalist who can't suppress his cynicism. But he likes William because he sees that his love for the music is why he has pursued this particular area, he knows that is has nothing to with a kid just wanting in on the "lifestyle". He doesn't do drugs or drink...so Lester becomes a sounding board, gets him his first interview with the up and coming band Stillwater. It is that fateful assignment that will land him in front of Penny Lane (played Kate Hudson) who oozes sex and coolness as well as brings Russel Hammond into the story (lead guitarist for Stillwater). The foundation is set from that scene for what will come. Penny Lane takes him under her wing because despite her actions she is just a kid too and feels a connection with young William right away.
Eventually one of his articles get picked up by the Rolling Stone and they call to interview him (having no idea that he is still in high school). The lead editor ask's him who he is listening to at that moment and he replies Stillwater, and they kind of like the idea of doing a story on a small band making it big, and so they offer to pay him to go out on the road with the band and get some real intimate interviews.
The story unfolds and there is not a single moment that is removable. When I first saw the movie I remember the feeling that came over me when the band picked up the lead guitarist from a party where he had been dropping acid all night...by the time the tour bus arrived in the morning the dude was cracked out and things were tense...but over the radio Elton John's Tiny Dancer begins to play and one by one everyone on the bus allows the music to breach the tension and everyone joins in. William is so exhausted from babysitting an acid tripping rock star all night leans over to Penny Lane and says that he needs to get home...and she looks at him and says "You are home".
Those are just a few highlights. The Mother plays an important role and there is closure in this movie. It is the full package. It is written brilliantly, casted to a tee, and directed so that the feel of 70's is palpable. It is a story about a boy who just genuinely falls in love with music and his talent as a writer throws him into a world that he is not prepared for, and not really all that OK with.
So this is one of ten movies that no matter how many times I watch always leaves me happy and pulling out some old school music.
I leave with you the best quotable from the movie:
Lester Bangs: Aw, man. You made friends with them. See, friendship is the booze they feed you. They want you to get drunk on feeling like you belong.
William Miller: Well, it was fun.
Lester Bangs: They make you feel cool. And hey. I met you. You are not cool.
William Miller: I know. Even when I thought I was, I knew I wasn't.
Lester Bangs: That's because we're uncool. And while women will always be a problem for us, most of the great art in the world is about that very same problem. Good-looking people don't have any spine. Their art never lasts. They get the girls, but we're smarter.
William Miller: I can really see that now.
Lester Bangs: Yeah, great art is about conflict and pain and guilt and longing and love disguised as sex, and sex disguised as love... and let's face it, you got a big head start.
William Miller: I'm glad you were home.
Lester Bangs: I'm always home. I'm uncool.
William Miller: Me too!
Lester Bangs: The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what we share with someone else when we're uncool.
William Miller: I feel better.
Lester Bangs: My advice to you. I know you think those guys are your friends. You wanna be a true friend to them? Be honest, and unmerciful.
Almost Famous
Why do I love this movie so much? Well it has great flow that is captivating from the opening scene, and as much as I want to call it a coming of age story, I am not sure that is accurate because the main character knew more than many of the adults. It is a love story in some respect because there is so much love between the characters, but no happily ever after cheesy shit. The stellar foundation of vintage classic music helps add depth. For those of you who have not seen this film let me at least give you a brief synopsis.
The main character is a young man named William and he is being raised by his single mother and his sister. His mother Elaine (played by Francis McDermott) is a college professor on the upper end of brilliant. She doesn't want her children to fall into the trap of drugs and evil rock music. She wants them to pursue the path ok true knowledge. Of course the older daughter Anita (played by Zoe Deschanel) hates that her mother tries to force her values on them. William on the other hand adores his mother and takes her advise to heart and doesn't even get mad when he finds out that she has been telling him that he is 15 so he won't feel weird about going to high school when he is only 13.
In one of the beginning scenes Anita gets caught trying to sneak a Simon & Garfunkel album in under her coat...and the following conversation takes place:
Anita Miller: It's unfair that we can't listen to our music!
Elaine Miller: That's because it's music about drugs and promiscuous sex.
Anita Miller: Simon and Garfunkel is poetry!
Elaine Miller: Yes it's poetry. It's poetry of drugs and promiscuous sex. Honey, they're on pot.
Anita Miller: First it was butter then it was sugar and white flour, bacon, eggs, Bologna, rock 'n roll, motorcycles. Then! It was celebrating Christmas on a day in September when you knew it wouldn't be commercialized! What else are you gonna ban?
Elaine Miller: Honey, you want to rebel against knowledge, I'm trying to give you the cliff notes on how to live life in this world.
Anita Miller: We're like nobody else I know!
Elaine Miller: I am a college professor. Why can't I teach my own kids? Use me!
Anita Miller: Darryl says that you use knowledge to keep me down. He says that I'm a "Yes" person and you are trying to raise us in a "No" environment.
Elaine Miller: Well, clearly "No" is a word Darryl doesn't hear much.
Anita Miller: I can't live here! I hate you! Even William hates you!
Young William: I don't hate her.
Anita Miller: You do hate her! You don't even know the truth.
Elaine Miller: Drama queen.
Anita Miller: Feck you!
Elaine Miller: Hey!
Anita Miller: This is a house of lies!
So as you can guess Anita decides to leave home with her boyfriend to find the freedom and independence that she has been seeking. The pivotal moment is when she tells him right before she leaves that she left all her vinyl under his bed. She writes a note that he should light candles and listens to The Dark Side of The Moon....fast forward several years and William is still a wonderfully innocent kid but he has fallen in love with the music that his sister left him and in his spare time he has been submitting articles to various magazines. He meets with his mentor Lester Bang, who is a long time music journalist who can't suppress his cynicism. But he likes William because he sees that his love for the music is why he has pursued this particular area, he knows that is has nothing to with a kid just wanting in on the "lifestyle". He doesn't do drugs or drink...so Lester becomes a sounding board, gets him his first interview with the up and coming band Stillwater. It is that fateful assignment that will land him in front of Penny Lane (played Kate Hudson) who oozes sex and coolness as well as brings Russel Hammond into the story (lead guitarist for Stillwater). The foundation is set from that scene for what will come. Penny Lane takes him under her wing because despite her actions she is just a kid too and feels a connection with young William right away.
Eventually one of his articles get picked up by the Rolling Stone and they call to interview him (having no idea that he is still in high school). The lead editor ask's him who he is listening to at that moment and he replies Stillwater, and they kind of like the idea of doing a story on a small band making it big, and so they offer to pay him to go out on the road with the band and get some real intimate interviews.
The story unfolds and there is not a single moment that is removable. When I first saw the movie I remember the feeling that came over me when the band picked up the lead guitarist from a party where he had been dropping acid all night...by the time the tour bus arrived in the morning the dude was cracked out and things were tense...but over the radio Elton John's Tiny Dancer begins to play and one by one everyone on the bus allows the music to breach the tension and everyone joins in. William is so exhausted from babysitting an acid tripping rock star all night leans over to Penny Lane and says that he needs to get home...and she looks at him and says "You are home".
Those are just a few highlights. The Mother plays an important role and there is closure in this movie. It is the full package. It is written brilliantly, casted to a tee, and directed so that the feel of 70's is palpable. It is a story about a boy who just genuinely falls in love with music and his talent as a writer throws him into a world that he is not prepared for, and not really all that OK with.
So this is one of ten movies that no matter how many times I watch always leaves me happy and pulling out some old school music.
I leave with you the best quotable from the movie:
Lester Bangs: Aw, man. You made friends with them. See, friendship is the booze they feed you. They want you to get drunk on feeling like you belong.
William Miller: Well, it was fun.
Lester Bangs: They make you feel cool. And hey. I met you. You are not cool.
William Miller: I know. Even when I thought I was, I knew I wasn't.
Lester Bangs: That's because we're uncool. And while women will always be a problem for us, most of the great art in the world is about that very same problem. Good-looking people don't have any spine. Their art never lasts. They get the girls, but we're smarter.
William Miller: I can really see that now.
Lester Bangs: Yeah, great art is about conflict and pain and guilt and longing and love disguised as sex, and sex disguised as love... and let's face it, you got a big head start.
William Miller: I'm glad you were home.
Lester Bangs: I'm always home. I'm uncool.
William Miller: Me too!
Lester Bangs: The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what we share with someone else when we're uncool.
William Miller: I feel better.
Lester Bangs: My advice to you. I know you think those guys are your friends. You wanna be a true friend to them? Be honest, and unmerciful.
A to Zen of Life
Live One Day at a time and make it a masterpiece!
Avoid negative sources, people, places and habits
Believe in yourself
Consider things from every angle
Don't give up and don't give in
Everything you're looking for lies behind the mask you wear
Family and friends are hidden treasures, seek them and enjoy their riches
Give more than you planned to
Hang on to your dreams
If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door
Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it
Keep trying no matter how hard it seems
Love yourself
Make it happen
Never lie, steal or cheat
Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values
Practise makes perfect
Quality over quantity in anything you do
Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer
Stop procrastinating
Take control of your own destiny
Understand yourself in order to better understand others
Visualise it
When you lose, don't lose the lesson
Xcellence in all your efforts
You are unique, nothing can replace you
Zero in on your target and go for it
Avoid negative sources, people, places and habits
Believe in yourself
Consider things from every angle
Don't give up and don't give in
Everything you're looking for lies behind the mask you wear
Family and friends are hidden treasures, seek them and enjoy their riches
Give more than you planned to
Hang on to your dreams
If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door
Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it
Keep trying no matter how hard it seems
Love yourself
Make it happen
Never lie, steal or cheat
Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values
Practise makes perfect
Quality over quantity in anything you do
Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer
Stop procrastinating
Take control of your own destiny
Understand yourself in order to better understand others
Visualise it
When you lose, don't lose the lesson
Xcellence in all your efforts
You are unique, nothing can replace you
Zero in on your target and go for it
Jose Mujica
So I just read an really cool article about the President of Uruguay, Jose Mujica. He is already considered the poorest President in the world, but despite that fact he donates 90% of his salary to charities...and he just made Uruguay the first country in the world to fully legalize cannabis. He said that the ecomony will majorly benefit from the addition of farmers that are able to not only grow cannabis, but more importantly it's sustainable and multi-purposed by product which of course is hemp! One small step at a time...he sounds like a cool little dude!
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
I just want to preface this first blog by telling you that I want to be as transparent as possible with my life with you. However, there is a time and a place for every story and circumstance. If I put it all out there up front you would not get the whole picture. I will try my best to relate my feelings back to particular moments in my life. However, I want to make sure that a good portion of my real focus in writing these blogs is to I take the passion that I have for finding inspiring things in this all to mundane world, and to share those things with people who are on the same path (or at least want to be headed in that direction). Througout these blogs I will spend some time going back and giving detailed personal information on some aspects of my life, but I don't want to abuse your trust and end up making you feel like you got suckered into taking care of the drunk chick at the party crying about her horrible life. So when I feel I have a story that helps bring light to the point (not diminish the point) of a song, a scene from a movie, a piece of art, political perspective that I am recommending I will not hold back.
If you want to follow my inner thoughts you should know where I am coming from. Here is how I look at my life; Every day in an effort to feel like there is a greater purpose and stay motivated....I look for and try to keep my mind occupied by beautiful, inspiring, soulful, deeper subject matter thoughout each day. I know that I have to go to work and work hard and be a good Mom to my 15 year old son, but I also know that I have a brillant mind, and if I don't stimulate it with things that make me feel more alive...than I am not living life to it's fullest potential, and for me feeling blaise about things leads to either stop trying to better myself, and that leads to depression because I know my own potential and I know what I want out of life. I am writing this blog because I want to connect with people who are done looking for meaning and purpose in all the wrong places, who have accepted that there can be peace and serenity (even when your broke and can't leave the house) in all the raw talent that in our modern age we have just a click away from us. Hopefully I will be able to connect with people who will broaden my horizons by furthering a discussion with their insight. But I also want to connect with the people that feel lost and hopeless. I am not saying that everything I blog will be your saving grace...but I also really want to reach the people that feel hopeless. If I can share a song, a passage, or a really funny quote that for a small moment in time relieves some of the hurt and pain from your world, than this will not just be therapy for me :) I hope that I can represent content in a way that you understand...
The methodology to the Monday thru Friday work routine is a nessecary evil. Don't get me wrong, I love my job and when I am working I try as hard as I can to keep focused on my tasks and do the best job possible each and every day. Personally I have found that it is easier to stay focused when I know that I am going to have some down time to just sit back and enjoy life (even if it is not a great amount of time...I take what I can get!). As a society we are so easily distracted from what should be our main focus because we allow the biased news organizaitions and ignorant people surrounding us on a daily basis to divert us away from what we should be clinging to...we seem more attracted to all of the negative things going on in the world around us...bad things make better stories right? We unconscienelly allow ourselves to get sucked in to the point that we are depressed over things we have no control over. We are a society that has more fun gossiping about something the more tragic the details. I am not saying that these subjects don't need attetion! The problem is that they just get discussed as gossip over a lunch break rather than a real meeting of the minds to put action behind stopping some of the travesty around us....k I have so much that I want to say....i need to practise self-control. I will get to those topics during future blogs.
What I really want you to take away from this initial blog is that I am only for talking about current issues facing the globe with people who are problem solvers and action oriented (if you want to be a coffee shop revolutionary this is not the sight for you). If you are not action oriented at this stage in your life...no judgement, I would just suggest that you will just be better suited to my blogs about the cool shit that I have come across at that moment in time. I just want to peal back the curtain a little bit and spread the good word about things that you may not be exposed to and show you (and myself for that matter), that there are things on a daily basis that if we take the time to look a litttle deeper, will make us appreciate the human spirit. I want to insence you to strive for greatness because it is a great adventure. I am not suggesting that we just bury our heads in the sand and listen to acoustical music and watch Anchorman all day (unless you are hungover or sick with the poo flu than yes that is exactly what I am suggesting). I am just saying that we all are already surrounded by people who bring the negative into our positive. We owe it to ourselves to seek out the good and celebrate it! Celebrate we will cuz life is short but sweet that's for certain (just a small Dave Matthews Plug).
I plan to blog about things that come across my path that make me stop and think...and when I am done thinking...I am super stoked, or at least provoked to look more into something! Sometimes I find insperation in an incredibly written and acted scene in a film that makes me think about things from that character or writers point of view. The best movies to me are the ones that allow me to relate and empathize with the circumstances within the story. Whether this feeling is evoked because I have expreirenced something similar and see it being portrayed is so raw, to the opposite exteme where perhaps my lack of exposure to what is unfolding is what draws me in. I am an observer of our species. I find a sense of wonder and appreciation when a film can make me feel like I know how the characters are feeling even if I haven't been through the same thing. However, I also have to have that movie that makes me laugh so hard I cry and have to get fresh air to recover (or clean up from peeing my pants...just a little pee pants sitch going on ). I love to laugh and I have a pretty warped sense of humor so when a movie can give me that much needed belly laugh (even if the laughter is from shock cuz wow they went there!) I will be a fan for life. In a later blog I will at least try and begin writing about some of the best films in history...in my humble opinion...but for now I must stick to the theme of this entry, which is to at least let you know what you are in for if you choose to take your rare free moment to ride my brainwaves! Consider this my forewarning :)
Sometimes I find inspiration in a passage out of a book that I am reading. You can ask anyone that knows me, and they will tell you that I am prone to pulling out a book and reading a small entry that really got my attenas up. I try and read one book a week (sometimes more sometimes less). People always ask how I can read that much and I just reply that when ever I have some down time I have a book in my face (i.e. smoke break, lunch break, late night sitting under my beautiful old tree, or early mornings where I go and sit with my feet in the water by the lake, maybe waiting to pick my son up from one of many soccer practises, long traffic lights...you get it). I carry a book with me at all times, and so I am never caught off guard if I a random boring five minutes pops up! No big deal here...you will find me reading (or staring for way to long at a hot dude). Sometimes passages will stop me right in my tracks and I will have to go and write it down in my notebook (if quiet contemplation is not an option). I marinade on the passage and eventually will decide what it means to me, and sometimes it turns out that it is not as meaningful as I thought (especially if I have had 5 glasses of wine!), but at least it gets me to keep my mind active by working it out in my head. For example, by the end of the book A Thousand Splendid Sons, I was so moved (by the whole book) but particularly when I read one of the very last passeges in the book. I stopped what I was doing and wrote it down on a napkin in the break room of my work. It stuck in my head and carried such meaning to me that by the end of the week I had it tattooed on my leg (picture will be uploaded). The small little sonnet was written by a 16th century poet named Hasef, and reads as follows; Jacob Shall Return to Canaan, Grieve Not. Hovels Shall Return to Rose Gardens, Grieve Not. If A Flood Shall Arise and Drown All That is Alive, Noah will be your guide in the typhoons eye, Grieve Not! At the time that I was reading this book about the grave injustices done to the women, I too was going through a very hard time. There were moments when I felt I had no fight left, I just felt empty and used...and the lack of fight in me scared me more than anything (you will understand when we get to know each other better that me not being headstrong and not rising to the challenge is rare and not a good sign..cuz I am one tough little lady...don't let the smooth groove fool you!). When I read that passage, I just kept reading it. To me it meant that no matter how bad you think things are, with patience and hard work, they WILL turn around. If you think that you have it bad look back into history and read about the stories past down about our ancestors and how they fought and overcame...it is INSPIRATIONAL! And for those of you who are reading that passage and turned off because you are thinking it comes from Christianity, let me drop a little knowledge on you. That poem was written by a Muslim. It is crazy to think that we have been engaged in a war of some form with a country that believes in all the same stories up until the New Testament, but the ages have proven that where you draw the line is the difference between life and death (sad I know!) Every religion's Bible (accept for new wave Morman, and Scientology) have almost identical versions of the Old Testament...it is only with the new Testament that each Religion splits off on their opinion about what happened next. For instance in the Koran it expresses that they very much believed that Jesus did many of his great works, and credit him to being an important prophet and scholar. They just call Shenanigans on him being the Son of God. Talk about going off on a rant...one minute I am talking about a passage the inspired me not to give up, and the next moment I am calling out hypocrosies among religion. Better off letting you know that you will need to get used to this if you should choose to keep up with my postings. I am a work in progress...at least that is what my over- priced therapist keeps saying :)
Often I am inspired by a lyric from a song. I can be just humming along and all of the sudden I will finally HEAR what they are saying and I am like "This is some deep content!" I love listening to Pandora because I plug in the people that I like and they give me new artists that they think I will like (I have added my Pandora station as a link to this blog site so that you can listen to tunes whilst you read... or for when you are tired of reading and be like "This bitch is crazy! I have 45 artists that you can select from and each artist you choose will uncover a treasure of new goodies and oldies that you have forgotten about). Musically my biggest fear/joy is that I will never catch up, like there will always be something great that I haven't discovered and it is that thinking that keeps me always listening. I am a fan of all sorts of music. The bottom line is I need to feel one of several feelings 1) Like I could have written those lyrics myself, 2) The beat has to give me goose bumps, 3) I feel the vibe so much that I don't care what people think...I am dancing! Music is the largest root in my tree of life. In darker times it has kept me from ending my life....literally I would keep telling myself the next shitty song that comes on and this little lady go night night long time...but the bad track never came when I wanted it to the most, and it is like the universe hears me and doesn't just throw me a subpar track....it sends me those ones that make my whole spirit quiet. Storytime :)... I was a part of the late 90's rave scene so I always feel a need to be around people that are responding to the same vibe. It was right around the time that I ended being a part of that scene that I fell back on an old comfort in the form of the Dave Matthews Band. I still have the original Crash CD that I bought almost 15 years ago. Their music was and is therapy for me, and it is because of them from I started looking deeper into that genre and came to find music that spoke to my soul and I couldn't imagine living without. I pay homeage to Dave Matthews Band because it is where the title for this Blog came from. My sister had a really shitty one bedroom apartment and when my parents were fed up with me leaving my young son to go party, they kicked me out, it was to her house that I crashed (many blogs to follow about the deepness of the bond between her and I). To keep food in the house, gas in the car, and enough drugs to keep us from having to be sober for any period of time, I started selling drugs. But don't let Hollywood fool you...in a small town on distributor level you can maybe buy a shitty car or furniture without a loan, but it isn't Scarface mansion money (it's pay your electric and water bill money)...especially if you are partaking in the product. So anywho...my sister had left me alone to go to her part-time job. I had a revolving door for several hours while I unloaded my product. I tried desperatley to get some of the peeps to stay and get high with me and hang out, but nobody wants to hang with their lonley dealer (an example of why I related so much to James Franco in Pineapple Express). So after my last appointment I decided that I had nothing better to do so I dropped three hits of purple gel tabs (acid people...the kind that if you hold up to a light you can't see the light through it). We couldn't afford TV, so I put on the Crash albulm and I cleared everything out of the living room and spread out my sister's Chicago Bulls blanket...I lay on my back switch hitting between a cigarette and the blown glass bong. I listened to the CD like three times in a row. Although I was totally feeling the vibe (literally) it took the third time for me to actaully grasp and articulate the beauty of the lyrics, and allow myself to let down my guard long enough to be honest with myself about what was going through my mind...and it was this...I wanted to be like them. I wanted to be a good laid back, driven, talented person. I didn't want to be doing drugs in a shitty apartment on the shitty side of town all by myself, selling to people who aren't half as smart as me. I had what I refer to as A STONED EPIPHANY, and although the change didn't happen overnight, or even within a year...the seed had been planted and to this day when I sit in my lovely little house and I am surrounded by the sounds of my sons laughter I feel like had it not been for that CD that night...I might not have survived if I had kept the mentality that was driving me....so naturally I tattooed the fire dancer on my back...so short story long...music can open you up if you are willing to really listen.
I also find inspiration by walking through local galleries and finding pieces that I could not even dream up in my wildest imagination. Coolest art gallery card I ever found was for Center Ground Gallery...and there slogan was "Find Your Center...Stand Your Ground".
I love...no I nerd out over good interior design because I believe that your environment plays a large role in the way you interact with other people. My home reflects my inner goal...peace, serenity, and a little bad ass (that's were the Samurai Swords come into the mix). My home is my refuge and so it is enveloped in meaningful decor that makes me feel happy when I look around, wrapped in aromas that can stimulate or relax the nervous system. I understand how important your one sqaure on this giant planet is and so I show it due respect. So I like to share those visions and help people create the best space for them. Helping to transform someone's environment can aid in them getting the motivation they need to make everything else fall into line...I love that shit!
I find inspiration in people who are going out and standing up for what is good, even when it seems that they are not making an impact. People that are conscience of the fact that human life is precious and that as a race of people it is our job to look out for those who cannot look out for themselves...even if maybe it is self inflicted, but more often a result of shit just not going your way...People lose their way...We shouldn't look down on someone for needing food stamps or medical assistance, rather we should have the compassion to spend the time and get down to the route of where it all went wrong and heal from there. I have been doing volunteer work as well as donating to Amnesty Internation for many years, and pre-warning...sometimes I will get worked up and want to talk about just that.
I am inspired by children who are given nothing but a bad deal and still remain kind and thankful. It is these children that deserve our attention and focus because they have faced the same obstacles as their peers, but they have chosen to remain vigilent and uncompromising.
Inspiration is all around us, and all I hope to do is share some of what inspires me with you. Some of it may not jive with you, and that's ok...but on the off chance that someone reads this and feels the same I look forward to your friendship and guidance as I continue my journey. Some may finish reading this and think that I am a total nut job for feeling this passionetly about groups of work, and if so this just isn't the blog for you...but I have a have an educated perspective and my cats aren't such a great audience..and my Mom and my Sister shouldn't have to shoulder the burden alone :) So moving forward I am not going to explain why I am writing something...you can just reference this blog...kbye!
If you want to follow my inner thoughts you should know where I am coming from. Here is how I look at my life; Every day in an effort to feel like there is a greater purpose and stay motivated....I look for and try to keep my mind occupied by beautiful, inspiring, soulful, deeper subject matter thoughout each day. I know that I have to go to work and work hard and be a good Mom to my 15 year old son, but I also know that I have a brillant mind, and if I don't stimulate it with things that make me feel more alive...than I am not living life to it's fullest potential, and for me feeling blaise about things leads to either stop trying to better myself, and that leads to depression because I know my own potential and I know what I want out of life. I am writing this blog because I want to connect with people who are done looking for meaning and purpose in all the wrong places, who have accepted that there can be peace and serenity (even when your broke and can't leave the house) in all the raw talent that in our modern age we have just a click away from us. Hopefully I will be able to connect with people who will broaden my horizons by furthering a discussion with their insight. But I also want to connect with the people that feel lost and hopeless. I am not saying that everything I blog will be your saving grace...but I also really want to reach the people that feel hopeless. If I can share a song, a passage, or a really funny quote that for a small moment in time relieves some of the hurt and pain from your world, than this will not just be therapy for me :) I hope that I can represent content in a way that you understand...
The methodology to the Monday thru Friday work routine is a nessecary evil. Don't get me wrong, I love my job and when I am working I try as hard as I can to keep focused on my tasks and do the best job possible each and every day. Personally I have found that it is easier to stay focused when I know that I am going to have some down time to just sit back and enjoy life (even if it is not a great amount of time...I take what I can get!). As a society we are so easily distracted from what should be our main focus because we allow the biased news organizaitions and ignorant people surrounding us on a daily basis to divert us away from what we should be clinging to...we seem more attracted to all of the negative things going on in the world around us...bad things make better stories right? We unconscienelly allow ourselves to get sucked in to the point that we are depressed over things we have no control over. We are a society that has more fun gossiping about something the more tragic the details. I am not saying that these subjects don't need attetion! The problem is that they just get discussed as gossip over a lunch break rather than a real meeting of the minds to put action behind stopping some of the travesty around us....k I have so much that I want to say....i need to practise self-control. I will get to those topics during future blogs.
What I really want you to take away from this initial blog is that I am only for talking about current issues facing the globe with people who are problem solvers and action oriented (if you want to be a coffee shop revolutionary this is not the sight for you). If you are not action oriented at this stage in your life...no judgement, I would just suggest that you will just be better suited to my blogs about the cool shit that I have come across at that moment in time. I just want to peal back the curtain a little bit and spread the good word about things that you may not be exposed to and show you (and myself for that matter), that there are things on a daily basis that if we take the time to look a litttle deeper, will make us appreciate the human spirit. I want to insence you to strive for greatness because it is a great adventure. I am not suggesting that we just bury our heads in the sand and listen to acoustical music and watch Anchorman all day (unless you are hungover or sick with the poo flu than yes that is exactly what I am suggesting). I am just saying that we all are already surrounded by people who bring the negative into our positive. We owe it to ourselves to seek out the good and celebrate it! Celebrate we will cuz life is short but sweet that's for certain (just a small Dave Matthews Plug).
I plan to blog about things that come across my path that make me stop and think...and when I am done thinking...I am super stoked, or at least provoked to look more into something! Sometimes I find insperation in an incredibly written and acted scene in a film that makes me think about things from that character or writers point of view. The best movies to me are the ones that allow me to relate and empathize with the circumstances within the story. Whether this feeling is evoked because I have expreirenced something similar and see it being portrayed is so raw, to the opposite exteme where perhaps my lack of exposure to what is unfolding is what draws me in. I am an observer of our species. I find a sense of wonder and appreciation when a film can make me feel like I know how the characters are feeling even if I haven't been through the same thing. However, I also have to have that movie that makes me laugh so hard I cry and have to get fresh air to recover (or clean up from peeing my pants...just a little pee pants sitch going on ). I love to laugh and I have a pretty warped sense of humor so when a movie can give me that much needed belly laugh (even if the laughter is from shock cuz wow they went there!) I will be a fan for life. In a later blog I will at least try and begin writing about some of the best films in history...in my humble opinion...but for now I must stick to the theme of this entry, which is to at least let you know what you are in for if you choose to take your rare free moment to ride my brainwaves! Consider this my forewarning :)
Sometimes I find inspiration in a passage out of a book that I am reading. You can ask anyone that knows me, and they will tell you that I am prone to pulling out a book and reading a small entry that really got my attenas up. I try and read one book a week (sometimes more sometimes less). People always ask how I can read that much and I just reply that when ever I have some down time I have a book in my face (i.e. smoke break, lunch break, late night sitting under my beautiful old tree, or early mornings where I go and sit with my feet in the water by the lake, maybe waiting to pick my son up from one of many soccer practises, long traffic lights...you get it). I carry a book with me at all times, and so I am never caught off guard if I a random boring five minutes pops up! No big deal here...you will find me reading (or staring for way to long at a hot dude). Sometimes passages will stop me right in my tracks and I will have to go and write it down in my notebook (if quiet contemplation is not an option). I marinade on the passage and eventually will decide what it means to me, and sometimes it turns out that it is not as meaningful as I thought (especially if I have had 5 glasses of wine!), but at least it gets me to keep my mind active by working it out in my head. For example, by the end of the book A Thousand Splendid Sons, I was so moved (by the whole book) but particularly when I read one of the very last passeges in the book. I stopped what I was doing and wrote it down on a napkin in the break room of my work. It stuck in my head and carried such meaning to me that by the end of the week I had it tattooed on my leg (picture will be uploaded). The small little sonnet was written by a 16th century poet named Hasef, and reads as follows; Jacob Shall Return to Canaan, Grieve Not. Hovels Shall Return to Rose Gardens, Grieve Not. If A Flood Shall Arise and Drown All That is Alive, Noah will be your guide in the typhoons eye, Grieve Not! At the time that I was reading this book about the grave injustices done to the women, I too was going through a very hard time. There were moments when I felt I had no fight left, I just felt empty and used...and the lack of fight in me scared me more than anything (you will understand when we get to know each other better that me not being headstrong and not rising to the challenge is rare and not a good sign..cuz I am one tough little lady...don't let the smooth groove fool you!). When I read that passage, I just kept reading it. To me it meant that no matter how bad you think things are, with patience and hard work, they WILL turn around. If you think that you have it bad look back into history and read about the stories past down about our ancestors and how they fought and overcame...it is INSPIRATIONAL! And for those of you who are reading that passage and turned off because you are thinking it comes from Christianity, let me drop a little knowledge on you. That poem was written by a Muslim. It is crazy to think that we have been engaged in a war of some form with a country that believes in all the same stories up until the New Testament, but the ages have proven that where you draw the line is the difference between life and death (sad I know!) Every religion's Bible (accept for new wave Morman, and Scientology) have almost identical versions of the Old Testament...it is only with the new Testament that each Religion splits off on their opinion about what happened next. For instance in the Koran it expresses that they very much believed that Jesus did many of his great works, and credit him to being an important prophet and scholar. They just call Shenanigans on him being the Son of God. Talk about going off on a rant...one minute I am talking about a passage the inspired me not to give up, and the next moment I am calling out hypocrosies among religion. Better off letting you know that you will need to get used to this if you should choose to keep up with my postings. I am a work in progress...at least that is what my over- priced therapist keeps saying :)
Often I am inspired by a lyric from a song. I can be just humming along and all of the sudden I will finally HEAR what they are saying and I am like "This is some deep content!" I love listening to Pandora because I plug in the people that I like and they give me new artists that they think I will like (I have added my Pandora station as a link to this blog site so that you can listen to tunes whilst you read... or for when you are tired of reading and be like "This bitch is crazy! I have 45 artists that you can select from and each artist you choose will uncover a treasure of new goodies and oldies that you have forgotten about). Musically my biggest fear/joy is that I will never catch up, like there will always be something great that I haven't discovered and it is that thinking that keeps me always listening. I am a fan of all sorts of music. The bottom line is I need to feel one of several feelings 1) Like I could have written those lyrics myself, 2) The beat has to give me goose bumps, 3) I feel the vibe so much that I don't care what people think...I am dancing! Music is the largest root in my tree of life. In darker times it has kept me from ending my life....literally I would keep telling myself the next shitty song that comes on and this little lady go night night long time...but the bad track never came when I wanted it to the most, and it is like the universe hears me and doesn't just throw me a subpar track....it sends me those ones that make my whole spirit quiet. Storytime :)... I was a part of the late 90's rave scene so I always feel a need to be around people that are responding to the same vibe. It was right around the time that I ended being a part of that scene that I fell back on an old comfort in the form of the Dave Matthews Band. I still have the original Crash CD that I bought almost 15 years ago. Their music was and is therapy for me, and it is because of them from I started looking deeper into that genre and came to find music that spoke to my soul and I couldn't imagine living without. I pay homeage to Dave Matthews Band because it is where the title for this Blog came from. My sister had a really shitty one bedroom apartment and when my parents were fed up with me leaving my young son to go party, they kicked me out, it was to her house that I crashed (many blogs to follow about the deepness of the bond between her and I). To keep food in the house, gas in the car, and enough drugs to keep us from having to be sober for any period of time, I started selling drugs. But don't let Hollywood fool you...in a small town on distributor level you can maybe buy a shitty car or furniture without a loan, but it isn't Scarface mansion money (it's pay your electric and water bill money)...especially if you are partaking in the product. So anywho...my sister had left me alone to go to her part-time job. I had a revolving door for several hours while I unloaded my product. I tried desperatley to get some of the peeps to stay and get high with me and hang out, but nobody wants to hang with their lonley dealer (an example of why I related so much to James Franco in Pineapple Express). So after my last appointment I decided that I had nothing better to do so I dropped three hits of purple gel tabs (acid people...the kind that if you hold up to a light you can't see the light through it). We couldn't afford TV, so I put on the Crash albulm and I cleared everything out of the living room and spread out my sister's Chicago Bulls blanket...I lay on my back switch hitting between a cigarette and the blown glass bong. I listened to the CD like three times in a row. Although I was totally feeling the vibe (literally) it took the third time for me to actaully grasp and articulate the beauty of the lyrics, and allow myself to let down my guard long enough to be honest with myself about what was going through my mind...and it was this...I wanted to be like them. I wanted to be a good laid back, driven, talented person. I didn't want to be doing drugs in a shitty apartment on the shitty side of town all by myself, selling to people who aren't half as smart as me. I had what I refer to as A STONED EPIPHANY, and although the change didn't happen overnight, or even within a year...the seed had been planted and to this day when I sit in my lovely little house and I am surrounded by the sounds of my sons laughter I feel like had it not been for that CD that night...I might not have survived if I had kept the mentality that was driving me....so naturally I tattooed the fire dancer on my back...so short story long...music can open you up if you are willing to really listen.
I also find inspiration by walking through local galleries and finding pieces that I could not even dream up in my wildest imagination. Coolest art gallery card I ever found was for Center Ground Gallery...and there slogan was "Find Your Center...Stand Your Ground".
I love...no I nerd out over good interior design because I believe that your environment plays a large role in the way you interact with other people. My home reflects my inner goal...peace, serenity, and a little bad ass (that's were the Samurai Swords come into the mix). My home is my refuge and so it is enveloped in meaningful decor that makes me feel happy when I look around, wrapped in aromas that can stimulate or relax the nervous system. I understand how important your one sqaure on this giant planet is and so I show it due respect. So I like to share those visions and help people create the best space for them. Helping to transform someone's environment can aid in them getting the motivation they need to make everything else fall into line...I love that shit!
I find inspiration in people who are going out and standing up for what is good, even when it seems that they are not making an impact. People that are conscience of the fact that human life is precious and that as a race of people it is our job to look out for those who cannot look out for themselves...even if maybe it is self inflicted, but more often a result of shit just not going your way...People lose their way...We shouldn't look down on someone for needing food stamps or medical assistance, rather we should have the compassion to spend the time and get down to the route of where it all went wrong and heal from there. I have been doing volunteer work as well as donating to Amnesty Internation for many years, and pre-warning...sometimes I will get worked up and want to talk about just that.
I am inspired by children who are given nothing but a bad deal and still remain kind and thankful. It is these children that deserve our attention and focus because they have faced the same obstacles as their peers, but they have chosen to remain vigilent and uncompromising.
Inspiration is all around us, and all I hope to do is share some of what inspires me with you. Some of it may not jive with you, and that's ok...but on the off chance that someone reads this and feels the same I look forward to your friendship and guidance as I continue my journey. Some may finish reading this and think that I am a total nut job for feeling this passionetly about groups of work, and if so this just isn't the blog for you...but I have a have an educated perspective and my cats aren't such a great audience..and my Mom and my Sister shouldn't have to shoulder the burden alone :) So moving forward I am not going to explain why I am writing something...you can just reference this blog...kbye!
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